I was chatting recently with a single male friend of mine about the options available to us, at “our” age, for finding other singles. (This friend is actually D1…remember him from the “Friend Zone”? Yes, D1, now to be known as Doug, and I, are destined to remain in the “Friend Zone”. In this exploration, it became ultimately clear, that we are meant to be, just friends.) Anyway, back to Doug. He was emphasizing the additional layer of difficulty COVID has presented. (I think we all may be feeling a bit of that right now, don’t you?) He was feeling especially impacted by its effect on the “meeting someone at a bar” opportunities. However, he was grateful, that this is inevitably a temporary situation.

Doug was telling me that he has tried different online dating options. As he explained it, it sounded to me, as though he did a version of viewing from the “nose bleed” seats on some dating sites. Doug said he never got the nerve or even the desire to make a move. It never felt right. It wasn’t for him.

Most recently, Doug has opened himself up to some “friend arranged” dates. So far, that has not worked out well. Oddly enough, during one, he found himself on a date with someone (after searching his memory bank for several minutes, as she looked so familiar) he realized he had been on a date with, decades before. He was like: WTH? How did this happen? I didn’t like her then…and, after a very (called) short evening, when she re-revealed “why” he didn’t like her then, he went on with…and I don’t like her now! He’s one of those friends, that doesn’t hold any punches. I’m sure you could tell that by his comment?! What about you? Have you tried any friend arranged dating?

Doug and I were social distancing and sitting on the boardwalk by the water, people watching, as we were doing our chatting about older dating. We joked about how, at that very moment “single eligibles” could be walking past us. How could we know? I’m pretty certain, single eligible men and women pass by us all, on a daily basis. And that’s unfortunate! Could we have passed by “the one”? It’s too bad we don’t send off some type of signal. That would make things so much easier. I mean, really, dogs have that little “doggie signal thing” going on. Okay, I know, so maybe that was a little gross…but you do know what I mean. Not that we could (or should) go around “sniffing”…but come on, how about a hint!

Discussing this, made my Billboard thought (that I joked about a few weeks back) flash through my head. As did my T-shirt idea. Did I tell you about that before? A T-shirt with kind of a “personal ad” listed on the front and back. I’ve been joking with friends, about wearing one, for quite some time now. An example of mine, would go something like this:

Seriously, I’m starting to think (yes, I know, I should include “over-thinker” on the list) this may not be a bad idea. Next thing you know, I’ll be out there with a Sandwich Board. lol!

SIDE NOTE (1): I had another thought, awhile back, about ways to signal our “single status” in a somewhat more subtle way. I had an idea for bracelets that would be identifiable. You become a member, have your information downloaded and you are assigned a bracelet. You see someone else wearing the same one, you immediately know, that they too are single and interested in finding someone. How I originally thought it would work, would be: If someone spotted someone else wearing the same bracelet, they would approach each other, get the bracelet ID information and contact each other through the membership/site. Then I thought, perhaps it could work, if they handed off some type of business card (provided through membership) with whatever contact information was personally comfortable and desirable. When I was sharing my idea with my “brain-iac” brother (he is so tech savvy) he said: “Why do all that? We can make the bracelets, in such a way, that all they have to do is tap them against each other and the information can be instantly downloaded.” I said: “That’s brilliant! Perfect.” He’s so SMAHT!! lol! I would still love to move on this idea. (NOTE: If someone out there, takes my idea and runs with it…please know, that I do expect lifetime royalties.) The bracelet would definitely need to be unique enough to be obvious, yet not TOO obvious (or unattractive).

BUMBLE: WHAT’S HAPPENING ON THE BEE-LINE.

Can you believe this…I really don’t have ANY new additions. One temporary one, I will share in a moment, but basically, I am still communicating with the same 2 guys. J4 (TV Guy) and B1 (The Giver). And yes, I have now met both of them. Both very nice men.

J4 (TV Guy). We met for coffee and a bagel. He looked very much like his pictures and was very much the man I expected. He told me about his previous loves, his family home, his friends, and job/company prior to his retirement. The behind the scenes TV work, was camera work, mostly news reports for major stations. He had his own studio back in the day and had over 40 employees. He is definitely enjoying being retired.

He was telling me about his work, when he drifted off on to a story about how he was filming this up and coming local band, etc. etc. and long story short…OMG he was talking about the band my ex fiance’ was in. What a small world!! Can you imagine? What are the odds?

He was generous with his time in conversation and asked me a few questions along the way. Though it was quickly evident to me, that I wasn’t attracted to him in “that” way, I did still enjoy our time together. He was pleasant and bright and interesting and real.

He was so real, that he shared how after being single the past two years, he was already starting to enjoy his being alone. I think it is sad how often I hear that from people. Dates, friends, co-workers, etc.

He did ask me if I would be interested in getting together again. He said he had company coming in and would be in touch soon. I do not want to mislead him, so I am not going to go on another date, but I don’t think his heart will hurt for my decision. I hope I never feel that way. Can you imagine yourself feeling that way? I feel I’ve so much love to still give inside, that it would be a shame to keep that within.

SIDE NOTE (2): I was telling a lifelong friend of mine, Lucy, about my two upcoming dates. My two different end of the spectrum dates. One, J4 (TV Guy) 72 years old, laid back and seemingly a bit of an introvert. The other, B1 (The Giver), 56 years young, a bit charming and a lot an extrovert. Lucy said to me: “Adrienne, what are you thinking?” I replied: “What do you mean?” She goes on with: “You’re going out with a 72 year old man?” I’m like: “Yessss?! I’m 62 you know?” Lucy then says: “I know. But you need to be going out with younger men. I’m afraid you’re going to be the death of him! You might give him a heart attack!” lol! She’s a funny girl!

B1 (The Giver). I was actually quite anxious for this date. After our video chat, the calls and messages continued coming in regularly. We continued getting more and more familiar with each other. By the time we met, I felt comfortable the moment I spotted his face.

He immediately greeted me with a hug and a quick kiss. (That quick kiss, was long enough to know, that the softest lips I have ever felt, in a romantic way, just touched mine.) That was a first for me, for a “date off of a site”. I have rarely kissed them…but never upon the “first greet”.

We spent a very comfortable 4 1/2 hours together. We ate, we had cocktails, we did selfies (at his request) and we went to a couple of prominent spots in the City we were in.

He was open about himself. Offered stories of he and his friends, his family, his organization, health practices, etc. He wasn’t that inquisitive of me though, only asking a couple of questions, regarding my family, as followups to my questions of his. It did get me wondering? Did I mention he was retired Law Enforcement? Hmmm? Perhaps he already knew “stuff” about me?? We shall see, I guess…

He had a lovely handwritten note for me upon arrival and a sweet gift on my departure, of a T-shirt (no, not a personal ad T-shirt, lol!) from his non-profit organization. It was scented with his cologne. (Do I need to worry about that? Hmmm…could this incredibly generous and kind man, be a player? That seems like kind of a “move” now doesn’t it? It didn’t in the moment. It just seemed genuinely sweet. Damn. Me and that “thing” I have for bad boys! But honestly, he doesn’t seem like a “bad boy”. Okay…eyes open.) I had a very nice time. I felt as though I had known him for much longer than I had. Kissing during COVID…I MUST’VE liked him! Yes, of course we kissed again. (When my daughter called me the following day, to see how the date went…she sounded shocked when I told her how much I liked him. She was cute: “But Ma, you never like anyone?!” lol!)

SIDE NOTE (3): Coco just asked me how things were going for me on “BIMBO”. lol!!!!!

There was a 3rd gentleman that I did communicate with briefly this past week. He seemed like a nice professional. Interesting profile and some likes in common. He freaked me out a bit though, when we had only exchanged approximately a dozen brief messages, and he replied with: “I know we hardly know each other (I wanted to say we don’t know each other at all), yet I feel a gentle sensation around my heart. Just wanted to share that with you.” He is probably a very kind and gentle soul. But I didn’t feel comfortable, so I am discontinuing that exchange.

BUMBLE: DOWN TO ONE.

SIDE NOTE (4): I happened upon a very sweet and romantic movie the other day, called: Letters to Juliet. (With such stars as: Amanda Seyfried, Vanessa Redgrave and Christopher Egan) Apparently it came out in 2010. Now, it is not a “knock your socks off” kind of movie, but it is heartwarming. In a “what if” we had or “what if” we could, sort of way. Briefly, it is described as: About this young writer that finds herself in Italy and visits a wall where the heartbroken leave notes to Shakespeare’s tragic heroine, Juliet Capulet. She finds one such letter and is so moved, that she writes the now elderly author. And you probably guessed it…yes, the story unfolds in a lovely, touching and moving way. I wanted to share, as I think it is worth a watch for any of you romantics out there. Yes, I am a softy for a wide array of love stories.

Please stay happy, healthy and safe! Until next Thursday…Adrienne